K minus 15 days - Stephen Hawking, Goldman Sachs, Emergency and Fixing
What does the English theoretical physicist Stephen Hawking, American financial services firm Goldman Sachs, The river Negro and Fulham's Craven Cottage have to do with this World Cup. Well, apart from Craven Cottage being a football ground and River Negro being the tributary to Brazilian river Amazon situated near the Arena Amazonia stadium in Manaus, there seems to be no link
But all of these are trending today prominently regarding the FIFA World Cup
Goldman Sachs Predicts World Cup Winner
Smitten by the World Cup bug, the analysts at Goldman Sachs deemed it fit enough for them to grab all the historical data of all 32 World Cup participant teams and generated a depiction of the results for each and every game to be played at the World Cup. They predicted that Brazil would defeat Argentina 3-1 to lift the trophy a record sixth time and England, as widely expected, will be pipped out by Italy and Uruguay. Defending champs Spain and strong favorites Germany will have to be satisfied with the semi final spots
While they have taken all the previous encounters of each team with others, only significant matches are considered, so friendlies are out of the equation, one flaw in the model is lack of consideration to current strengths and form. It is strictly based on historical data
Stephen Hawking Formulates English Success
England finally found why it is found wanting in the big tournaments since their solo 1966 Cup victory, and the light is shed by none other than the English physicist Stephen Hawking. Commissioned by the bookmaker Paddy Power, the scientist delved into the roots of theoretical physics to unveil the exact reasons for the nations patchy performances over the years and suggested the fixes. Here are some excerpts from his observation
- They need to wear red uniforms to get motivated to win, as red is the color of confidence and aggression
- WAGs are not the reason for their failures, actually presence of WAGs is optimal for English success
- To be more successful in taking penalties, they need to take at least three steps in their run ups, aim for top corners on either side and give the ball some velocity. Also use the side foot instead of laces
- Bald or fair headed players are more likely to score, while the reason for that is still a mystery, but strikers are generally better than defenders and midfielders
He also reckoned that the heat, game timings and other issues like playing away from home and at a higher altitude would make the current team unlikely to get success at Brazil. Hawking finished with a remark that him being a theoretical physicist he would be a marginally better qualified than Paul the Octopus to make predictions
Emergency in Manaus, Negro Swells
Coming to River Negro in Manaus, the Amazon tributary is overflowing and the Manaus has gone into a state of 180-day Emergency to deal with all the possibilities that might arise from the circumstances. According to the authorities, the river might swell into the city but flooding is nearly not a possibility
The situation however would not affect the games to be played at Arena Amazonia during the month long tournament. The emergency is placed so that the emergency services can be swiftly deployed when in need
Friendly Fix at Craven Cottage
The British National Crime Agency(NCA) has alerted FIFA over the possibility that the friendly match to be held between Scotland and Nigeria, at Fulham's Craven Cottage this Wednesday might have been fixed. The Scottish Football Association has been liaising with NCA, which handles serious and organized crime investigations, regarding the fixture
The game would go on with routine preparations and arrangements though
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